Wednesday, May 20, 2015

The Ins and Outs of the LU: Episode 28




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We're about an hour and a half away from the next episode of Lucha Underground, and while NXT might try to convince you otherwise, the LU remains the best wrestling going today. What does tonight have in store for us? Well, we know for a fact that there will be three matches tonight and a presumably awesome Johnny Mundo/Vampiro interview, but not much else. Will Mil Muertes and Catrina continue the mind games with Fenix? Will Pentagon Jr do Pentagon Jr things? And how many times will Dario Cueto proves that he's the man? You'll just have to tune in tonight to find out. Till then, let's break down the card. ON WITH THE SHOW!

Prince Puma vs. Marty the Moth

What to Expect: Holy mark out moment Batman, Marty the Moth is debuting tonight?! This is a moment right up there with the first time I saw Inherent Vice, every Yvonne Strahovski scene in Chuck and Sami Zayn's NXT title victory last December (WWE's last purely great moment IMO). I mean seriously, did you see how hilariously awesome Marty's debut was a few weeks ago? I have a feeling he's going to be gold for the LU, and what a great start for him to go up against a dude like Puma. I expect this match will be fun and I expect Hernandez will ruin it in the end because THE KONNAN POWERS EXPLODE and all.


Winner: No contest, as Hernandez interferes within five minutes and destroys both guys while Konnan looks on sternly from ring side. How depressing. By the way, can they just turn Konnan already? There's a better chance of me meeting Alison Brie at a bar tonight than there is of him staying face. Just get it over with!

Texano vs. DelAvar Daivari

What to Expect: Hopefully a better effort than two weeks ago, when they two engaged in the shortest brawl the first scene in Road House. Against my cynical nature here, I'm going to pull a YourAyatollah (kick it homies!) and give this match some positive vibes. I still believe Texano is a good wrestler with something to prove in the Temple, and I still believe Daivari is a much better wrestler than most people give him credit for. If they give this some time, this can be really good. Just please, give it some time guys!

Winner: I'm going to go with Daivari here. Again, he's the newcomer, and while that didn't work out for Jack Evans last week, it has to for someone eventually! I say tonight is the night, and Daivari picks up a cheap victory to continue the feud.

LADDER MATCH for the Trios Championship

Ivelisse, Angelico and Son of Havoc (c) vs. The Crew

What to Expect: Here it is guys, the LADDER MATCH, as Dario Cueto would put it. By the way, has anyone in the history of the western hemisphere ever said ladder match better than Cueto? It's like he just watched the tears in a rain scene from Blade Runner AND was announcing Thunderdome at the same time. All the more reason to love Cueto. Who else in the world could get a video of himself saying LADDER MATCH for over 20 minutes while Big Ryck angrily reacts?


Oh yes, the match itself. Isn't this going to be great? On one hand, you have The Crew, that wonderfully villainous trio that's fighting not just for the titles, but to avoid being sent to Matanza's room, which I'm guessing doesn't involve a round of Super Smash Brothers. On the other, you have the most entertaining team in the world today trying to overcome their hysterical chemistry problems and poor Ivelisse's bum leg. This will be action packed, it will feature some cool spots, and maybe just maybe Angelico will try to top his death defying spot from just a few weeks ago. It's going to be a good one guys.

Winner: The Trios Champions are going to retain. They're just too entertaining, their continued overcoming of the odds despite all sorts of issues is gripping, and dammit don't you just want to see how far this circus can go? Plus, I kind of want to see The Crew meet Matanza, if only so we can get more clues as to who he is. Regardless, the champions retain, perhaps with Angelico's AAA partner Jack Evans riding in on the cockiest white horse alive to save the day (and cause even more friction.

That'll do it guys. I'll be back tomorrow with a review of the show! Till then, watch Lucha Underground, potentially watch NXT after Lucha Underground, watch Inherent Vice even later tonight, and SUMMER SUMMER SUMMER SUMMER!!!



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